It’s been a while abi? I’m sure you’ve been wondering where I’ve been. Well, I was in the middle of exams….trying to make sure Daddy Panda’s hard earned money wasn’t going down the toilet. But it was good. God took care of me, now awaiting the results. For those people that called, texted, tweeted, or whatever, wishing me the best in my exams, and praying for me & stuff, thanks. I appreciate. If you didn’t, well…I hope your dog dies. K
Where else have I been? Well, since Thursday night, I’ve been right where Globacom Nigeria wanted me to be; Bent over, right in front of them, with my pants around my ankles.
Two bloody days!!! That’s all I have to say.
Anyways… a few days ago, I was reading a post on http://www.wisdomismisery.com/ called “The Good Girl vs. Bad Girl Conundrum”, and it was about, how guys, although they want one, cannot handle having a freak in the sheets as their girlfriend. Supposedly, we’ve been raised to respect women, and the level of sexual deviance necessary for “Freakiness” is just not something that a guy can handle, and still respect his girlfriend. So usually, he’ll either suffer like that (assuming he wants a freak) or go out and find a freak to satisfy his dark, inner desires.
On Thursday, surprisingly, this was the same topic of discussion on Twitter’s #Tweminar, (arranged by @Gigachic I think) . Would a guy rather have a good girl, or a freak? Guys say they want freaks, but they can’t respect them…blah blah bollocks.
From a maverick’s perspective, this is all just bullshit.
First of all, some operational definitions:
Freak: A babe who knows how to work it in bed. Has a very good sexual appetite, & knows how to break a guy off properly.
Good Girl: A girl who is supposedly “innocent” in the ways of sexual activities. She has no experience, and will probably be an “ok” sexual partner.
Now, let’s get to it.
Every guy, at least every sensible guy I know, would love to be able to have amazing sex with their girlfriends. The kinda sex that leaves you partially deaf in one ear for like 30mins. The kinda sex that makes a brother get outta bed and go cook a meal for her right after. How do you do that without a freak?
I fail to understand why people would think that a guy can’t handle the “Lady in the street but freak in the sheets” girlfriend. Okay, I do though. Women are so tied up in what they think the Nigerian Man is that they forget that we’ve evolved over the last decade or so. So, they feel this odd need to pretend, to be something they’re not, just so the dude will respect and stay with them.
Here’s the truth. Every guy wants to be able to have the kind of sex I described above, with his girlfriend. If he can’t get good sex, he’s going to be sexually frustrated. Even more so, if he has actually had sex on that level, with someone else, at some point in his life, before this girlfriend showed up. Now, a sexually frustrated man will most likely resort to:
- Just being plain old miserable for the length of the relationship.
Let’s be honest. None of these are desirable alternatives. No woman wants a cheating man, and a lot of women feel insulted if her man would rather beat off than sleep with her.
Now, on Thursday, while Tweminar was going on, everyone kept saying how the man would cheat if he couldn’t get a freak in the sheets…”the woman nko?” was what I asked.
If the woman is a closet freak, who’s been pretending to be a good girl so that her man won’t feel insecure and get disrespectful, gets frustrated cos this dude is just doing the same old missionary, when she wants him to spread her across three continents, pull her hair and drive her home like a pack of wild horses (pardon meJ)…well, we’re gonna have the same effects as listed above with the sexually frustrated dude. So at the end of the day, with the pretense and “good girl”ism, everyone gets screwed (just, not the way they’d want to be screwed)
It’s all about honesty.
First of all, ladies. I know a good man is hard to find and all, but really. Making yourself unhappy just so some dead guy can take you serious is not the way forward. If he can’t accept you for who you are that really is his luck. You wanna let out the freak within, please, don’t dull yourself, or there’ll be nobody to blame but….you.
Fellaz, I think it’s time we stop thinking in stereotypes. “Freak” and “Ho” are two completely different words. Just because she’s freaky, doesn’t mean you can’t respect her. She is not a ho. And if you say that’s what you want, then don’t mess about when you get it. And, if you get a girl who actually is a good girl (no pretense here), then you have two options. Rather than start cheating, or endure a hopeless relationship, you can either; 1. Leave her be, and let someone who will appreciate her for who she is, come into her life. Or… 2. You can teach her.
Personally, I prefer the second option. In my opinion, everyone has a freak within. They just haven’t been introduced yet. So, rather than going out to get the freak as your side chic, teach your girl that it’s okay to be freaky. And all those things you want her to do? Teach her. Slowly, bit by bit. Let her use initiative sometimes. An added bonus that comes with teaching, she does things exactly the way you want her to do them. It’ll take time, but sooner than later, you’ll have the woman you want.
A word of advice though; is be careful what you wish for. Know the kind of girl that you’re making into a freak. Don’t go complaining if you create an uncontrollable sex monster o. it’s just one of the hazards you have to deal with. And if you want a freaky girlfriend, be ready to deal with what you asked for.
Ladies, not every guy that says they can handle the “Lady in the street – Freak in the sheets” woman, actually can. Look very well at the kinda guy first…test him with little things…you know how you women do. Just sha know what’s up.
That’s all I have to say for now…I’ve got other stuff I wanna write…some poetry & stuff, but that may come later. If you wanna read the “The Good Girl vs. Bad Girl Conundrum”, check out http://www.wisdomismisery.com/?p=2115 ok?
Have a good week.