Hey there good people…
Yes, I know I abandoned everyone. I’m terribly sorry. I’ve been kinda down with a selective form of writer’s block, and as such, I couldn’t write anything till I was done with the story I was writing. Thankfully, I’m done with it so I can think and put out stuff. I’m doing writing exercises to help me push the block outta the way so I hope things should go back to normal soon.
Alright then… y’all know it’s usually when something happens to catch my attention that I decide to write so… wait first… lemme play one jam like this…
*NP “Lady” by Fela*
If you call am “woman”, African woman no go gree.
She go say…she go say “I be lady o”
I heard this song a long time ago… and when I was old enough to make some sense of it, I just thought it was a song that was poking fun at babes. It was silly and all, but I didn’t really pay it any mind… until recently.
A few weeks ago, I was talking to one of my female friends, and I called her a girl. But then I apologized and said she was a woman. Now this babe, to my surprise, looked at me and said “I’m not a woman o, I’m a lady. I’m too young to be a woman. I mean… I’m only 22.”
A few days later, I was talking to another chic friend, and when the same thing came up and I called her a woman, she told me that she’s “not a woman o…” So I asked her if she was a girl. And she said no. And of course I asked, “so what are you?” and she says “I’m a lady”.
At this point in time, I burst out laughing and she has this bemused look on her face wondering why I’m laughing my ass off. So I ask; “Babe, are you saying that the transition phase between being a girl and being a woman, is being a lady?” And she looked at me and said, “ehen now.”
O ga o.
I’m confused as to when this happened; when “lady-hood” suddenly became the transition phase where members of the female specie nestle on their way to womanhood from girlhood, sort of like the cocoon that shields the phase between caterpillar and butterfly. As far as I know, “lady” is a title that was used to address women of noble birth or some other form of superior social standing back in the day, and now is simply used as a polite way of referring to a woman and the only “women” that try to claim “lady” by force are really just peasants trying to feel noble by force. But of course, a lot of Nigerian babes just love to go the hardest when they’re displaying ignorance. I mean really. Can you imagine a dude saying “I’m not a boy, but I’m not a man; I’m a Lord.” Or saying, “I’m too young to be a man. I’m a gentleman.” (I’m going to assume that there’s no dude out there with the IQ that God gave gravel that would be dumb enough to say that so…) How stupid would that sound? That’s basically the same thing going on here.
And then, I just don’t get it. Do these members of the female race imagine that a man would want a “lady” and not a “woman”? By the old meaning of what a lady is, these were just women who were high born, most of them couldn’t do a single thing for themselves besides maybe knit and (if they were exceptional) cook. They were mostly of no use to their fathers than to hold their virtues with all chastity, be pretty and get married to some lord who would pay a handsome bride price for them. That is all.
Now bring that to modern times; that kind of woman would be a liability in all senses of the word. I don’t want that kind o. I want a strong woman that I can count on to help out when there’s trouble. That can look out for herself when I’m not there and watch my back when I need it. I don’t want any woman that’s just fine for nothing (although I do want a fine woman *winks*) and I’m sure my brothers agree with me.
So why do these Nigerian women place so much emphasis on being “ladies” and not “women”? I have absolutely no idea. Maybe somebody can shed some light on it *shrugs*. Women complain about how there many good men aren’t left in the world. My sister Sisi Ijebu in her Last Post claimed that for every correct woman out there, there’s only 0.67 good men. And I actually can’t disagree. My lot is a rare breed *DodgesSlippers*. So how do you think we should manage when the women actually believe that it’s better to be a “lady” than to stand queen like a real woman?
Anyways, I still have to work on bringing my writing back out, but this is kinda just an FYI thing. My sisters; “lady” is a title. It’s not who you are. You can be a lady if you behave like one, you can act all lad-like i.e. noble, self-respecting, etc… but that is not a substitute for being a girl, or a woman. Quit being ignorant okay?
O by the way,