Challenging Myself: Day Twenty Eight

[Dust | Frank Ocean]

So, the last year has been… interesting. I’ve gone through many things, and come out on top. One of these things, I’d have to say, has to be NYSC. I got posted to Niger State, originally, and I remember that when I got there, I tried to reconcile the idea of my staying there for an entire year, and it just didn’t make any sense. Besides the fact that the Northern part of Nigeria has been… dangerous to say the least, it was just too far away from… everything. I didn’t know anyone there, I was… confused. But well, I got relocated to Lagos, and then began my journey here. It was a long journey, it wasn’t easy, and I’ve gone through a lot of stuff as I walked down that road.

But that’s over now.

A friend of mine asked me how I feel about it. I don’t know how I’m meant to feel. Free? Like a weight has been lifted off my shoulder? Maybe… I’m just really glad I won’t have to wear those ugly ass uniforms anymore. I’m glad I won’t have to leave my crib to go sit down somewhere for hours, in the name of Community Development where I never did anything but sit.

I’m glad this chapter of my life is at an end. I wrote it; full of mistakes and experiences, but I wrote it. And as I close it today, a new chapter begins. And I’ll write that as well, until that ends. And I’ll keep writing. “…and when the ink dries, and the pages turn to dust, so will we return to dust…”

[Dangerous | Busta Rhymes]

Day Twenty Eight: My Happiest Month This Year

Okay, considering that we’re in October, I think it’s kinda weird that I’m attempting to decide what month I was happiest. Shouldn’t I just push this particular post to December? Wouldn’t that make more sense? No? No? Okay…

If I had to pick a month when I was happiest, in the last ten months, it’d have to be February. In February my life was… uncomplicated. I’d just moved out of my old man’s house, My mama was still in town, my old man and I had started getting along (cos I’d moved outta the house), I’d just started my job in an office that I really loved working at, I was… I wouldn’t say I was in love or in a relationship, cos I wasn’t, but I had an arrangement going on that I was pretty happy with. Things were looking pretty certain for me. And that’s one thing I love; certainty. I like feeling like I know what’s going on. Even if I’m not in control of it, the simple fact that I actually know what’s happening and there’s nothing to worry about, is for me, a very wonderful thing.

[We Made It | Busta Rhymes & Linkin Park]

February was a good month. March brought a lot of uncertainty and fear, and well… the months that followed weren’t so easy. But things get better eventually. This is one thing I believe; cos I have to… cos I need to… the year isn’t over yet. Maybe November and December will bring more joy. I hope they bring you joy.

Day Twenty Eight, done.

-Panda-

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About The Capoeira Panda

Panda makes his home in the world of words and metaphors. In the hopes to be more than just a confused blogger, he currently works as the editor for an ecommerce company that was good enough to hire him, and lives with his flat mates & two imaginary dogs who get along just fine. He enjoys reading good books, writing, relaxing with his friends, & poking fun at his mother over the phone. When he's not doing any of these, he sometimes sits back and wonders why anyone expects to learn anything useful about him by reading this bio. View all posts by The Capoeira Panda

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